My First Film is one of the most unique films I have seen in a while. From what I understand, the movie is at least partially autobiographical, based on events from the life of writer and director Zia Anger. It’s also incredibly meta. The movie stars Odessa Young as Vita, a young director recounting her experience making her first film. But to say that’s all that this movie is about wouldn’t be right. 

It’s not just about the struggles of a first-time filmmaker, it also delves into the complexities of relationships, the female experience, and the very essence of what it means to create something. 

I’ve watched countless films, but this one stands out as perhaps the most raw and deeply personal. It’s precisely movies like this, though, that make me a big fan of this film’s distributor, Mubi. For those unaware, Mubi isn’t just a distributor, but also a streaming platform and production company. Their library includes some major award-winning films, but what I like most about Mubi is how their content focuses on up-and-coming auteur filmmakers. 

In my Alien: Romulus review, I went on for some time about the Disney-fication of cinema that is focused on cheap thrills, designed to manipulate an audience trained to cheer for the past rather than embrace something new. Mubi is the complete opposite, supporting risk-takers that dare to do something new and unique with their films. To be clear, this is not a sponsorship plug either. Mubi is one of the few streamers willing to support daring filmmakers and strive to offer their films in theatres, two things that matter very much to me. They also remain ad-free and one of the more affordable options while the other streamers repeatedly increase their prices and introduce ads. 

My First Film will have a limited theatrical run starting on August 30th and will be available worldwide on Mubi on September 6th. If you’re not already a Mubi subscriber, you can sign up now and get your first seven days free. Billy Feldman co-wrote the film with Anger and the rest of the cast includes Devon Ross, Cole Doman, Jane Wickline, Philip Ettinger, Eamon Farren, Eleanore Hendricks, Sage Ftacek, Jackson Anthony, Seth Steinberg, Hailey Gates, Sarah Michelson, Abram Kurtz, and Ruby Max Fury. 

So, was My First Film a promising new beginning for Zia Anger?

My Thoughts

When the credits rolled on My First Film, I found myself staring into space, trying to process what I’d just experienced. In a word, this film is authentic. Its rawness and Anger’s fearless approach create a deeply poignant experience.

Certain moments, especially between Vita and her boyfriend, were so visceral that I felt a physical reaction. There was one scene in particular where I wanted to step into the film just so I could call out this character for how they were acting.

I particularly loved Odessa Young as Vita. The whole thing really rests on her shoulders and she was absolutely brilliant. I always felt myself rooting for her character, even as she did things that upset and alienated people. Even if I disagreed with her choices, I understood them and this really comes down to a solid script and a strong performance from Young. 

Beyond the writing and performances, the music and cinematography also stood out. The score amplified the film’s emotional depth, while creative lighting added a dreamlike quality to certain scenes. 

But the heart of this movie lies in its themes. I mentioned earlier just how personal this movie felt, and I think this created some powerful moments. However, I also struggled to find my way into what I thought were the more prominent aspects of the movie. To be clear, this is not a criticism but more of an observation. Much of this movie is about creation, but that manifests in two large ways in the film: through the creation of a movie and the creation of life itself through pregnancy. Now, neither of these aspects are very applicable to me, but nevertheless I was still able to understand things, even if I didn’t feel them as strongly as some others might. 

One particular aspect that stuck out to me, though, was the isolation that Vita experiences. She struggles during the production of her movie with this feeling that nobody is as committed to it as she is and the impacts of that are significant. This is further complicated outside of the production of her movie as Vita deals with some deeply traumatic personal experiences and unfortunately goes through them all alone. You feel the impact of these moments on the character, and I really appreciated that the narrative allowed the character to comment on these moments with the benefit of hindsight. 

The movie also utilizes its meta aspects to great effect when communicating its themes. Characters discuss the meaning and intent behind their scenes in the movie they’re making, but it never feels forced, it’s integral to the narrative. They also got creative in the edit, sprinkling in real footage that Anger shot of herself into the movie at various points. Some aspects almost feel documentary-like. These moments feel very clear and visually distinct, but they aren’t distracting and they blend in seamlessly into the fictional part of the movie. 

Without giving too much away, the film’s final act is where it gets the most meta and takes the biggest risks. Anger takes a big swing here and I found myself uncomfortably laughing at how perplexing this scene was. During this scene, though, a character says a line that snapped me out of what I was seeing and sent me deep into thought.

Verdict

Some movies can be fully experienced and understood by just reading a plot summary. My First Film is the exact opposite. This is a film that demands to be experienced firsthand, with layers that can’t be captured in words alone.

Undoubtedly, this is one of the most unique and personal films I’ve ever seen. Zia Anger blurs the line between fiction and reality with remarkable authenticity and while I struggled to fully connect with some of its deeper themes, the emotional impact was undeniable. For those who resonate with its story, this film could be profoundly transformative. I sincerely hope My First Film is just the beginning for Zia Anger, because cinema needs genuine voices like this now more than ever.